28 days until I turn 25...

Last fall, my friend and I were in Barnes and Noble shopping for a book she found online, "20 Something, 20 Everything". We found it, she bought it. I was instantly fascinated that she was buying a book about this. I wanted to borrow her copy, but couldn't wait so found one on Half.com. Before I go any further, I hope that you are not anticipating any sort of review of this book, you won't be getting one. To continue, I anxiously awaited my copy of this book, so I looked it up online and realized the author has a blog, and I read some of it. In this weeks time, I began thinking about my approaching milestone.

25 years is appropriately, the first birthday milestone you approach after the fun ones have passed. 16 you get your license and a car (or in my case, you have to wait a year for your own car). 18 you are a legal adult, so you can go to jail (doubt it) buy cigarettes (nope), vote (it wasn't an election year) play the lottery (had to wait til September til TN got the lottery) and go into Adult bookstores (which I did, actually). 21 is that big one, the one where you say, "Bring on the drinks!" I'm an adult, I can do whatever I want. Including getting drunk in a strange bar in Clearwater and going back to your hotel with your boyfriend and passing out on the bed before he can even lock the door. At 22, the fun ages are over.

I began thinking that when I finally get to 25, I will not have accomplished any of the things I thought I would have (with the exception of being married! Hooray, got one of the goals down!) It's truly a depressing thought, honestly. I have not graduated college, I do not own a home, I do not have a super fantastic, accomplishing job, and I do not have a baby or two. How upsetting! What does that say!? I haven't done anything!

That's not true. I have done things. I have realized dreams, had some fun, committed myself to another human, held a good job, bought a car (or 2...) made decisions, stood my ground, found my faith in God and what that truly means, been walked over, realized what it means to be a grown up. Why do I still feel like there should have been a certain path I followed? I let those feelings go, and put my birthday off for awhile. In the meantime, my book had arrived, I read the first chapter and a little more... and put it down. I want to finish it, but I just haven't gotten around to it.

So, now, it's 28 days until the "big birthday" and I'm getting txts from my husband with his plans and ideas for what we can do that weekend. To him, I'm his Beautiful Birthday Girl :-), it's another special day celebrating my aging. He wants to take me out, have some fun. Why should I be feeling any different than him? I've ALWAYS been excited about birthdays. Long after my friends stopped celebrating and having parties and cake and decorations, I still make a big deal about my birthday. I still have tradition parties, sometimes even with my parents even now that I'm in my twenties. Cake, blow out candles, make a wish. 25 should be and will be no different. It's a big deal!

So...after this long-winded tangent, why is there a pull at my heart..saying...Now you're 25, what can you say for yourself? I even googled "turning 25" a few minutes ago. All the top results have the words "quarter life crisis" in them. All of them. It seems I am not the only one who feels unaccomplished in her twenties. But seriously... we should all get a birthday hat and get a cake and be happy. We should be looking towards our future. I have to tell myself that sometimes. Stop thinking about what you haven't done, and what you will do.